There's nothing more impressive than funny English.

Question #1: What would you do with $1,000,000?
-- I will sleep on the roll of bills. Next, I will scatter it from helicopter. Next I will buy all commodity in all one hundred yen shop.

Question #2: What is your favorite part of Japanese culture?
-- My favorite part of Japanese culture is instant noodles. I put hot water into it. I wait for three minutes. It becomes very beautiful, shining, and delicious. I think this is true Japanese culture.

Question #3: Who is your idol? / Tell me a Japanese joke!
-- My idol is Ms. Higuchi. I am happiest when I am thinking about her. I love her. This is Japanese joke.

Courtesy of one of my first year students. Ms. Higuchi is the Japanese teacher who teaches English with me sometimes.